Worst Movie Ever

           In the world we live in, full of action packed adventures and sci-fi thrillers, it is quite a feat to make a new blockbuster or even a half descent film for that matter.  Surprisingly though, most movies these days are fairly entertaining and somewhat worth watching.  However, there’s always an exception.  In this case, that exception is titled Troll 2.  This would be the last movie I would recommend to anybody, for many factors.  Some of those factors are that there was not one experienced actor, the production staff hardly spoke English, and it wasn’t believable even in the least.   I could go on for pages and pages writing reason after reason as to why it is the worst movie ever created, but I’ll try to keep it brief.

            Actors make or break movies.  You can fall in love with them, despise them all your heart, and even laugh at their expense.  That being said, the actor needs experience and talent to pull off a character, and usually the most experienced actors get the lead roles in motion pictures.  Depressingly, that is not the case in Troll 2.  Nearly the entire cast of this movie went to audition to be extras in the cast, but to their surprise, were given the lead roles.  George Hardy for example, a dentist from Salt Lake City with absolutely no acting experience was given the lead role.  It was given to him by a board of Italians that didn’t speak a word of English; the only reason he got it was because they liked his charisma in trying out.  Another member of the cast was played by a patient at a mental hospital, who was on a day trip in Utah.  Just as I was talking about earlier, the actors make or break movies; in this case they shattered it.  However, we shouldn’t only blame the actors for this flop, we need to look at the staff as well.

            The main writer and creator for this film, Claudio Fragasso, was Italian, with little knowledge of the English language.  Because of that, parts of the movie don’t make sense, and the other parts sounds like a 4-year-old wrote them.  The director, Joe D'Amato, had the idea that the less money spent on the production and making of the film, the better.  That makes for horrible costumes, score, actors, and production value in general. 

            Not only was it the actors, crew members, or directors that aided in Troll 2’s downfall, the story line wasn’t believable.  Some of my favorite movies include aliens, wizards, and even hobbits. They have become my favorite movies because of how believable they actually are.  Excellent movies enable us to plunge into sci-fi worlds that we didn’t know existed without hardly noticing it.  Yet, as you can guess, that is not the case in Troll 2.   You are thrown into a world of vegetarian goblins wearing Halloween masks, people turning into mush, and even random explosions of popcorn. 

            I really hope you took time to read my opinion, hoping that it will help you avoid watching Troll 2.  Rather than bearing through an hour and a half of misery, find something more enjoyable to do, like stare at the sun, or rip your hair out. Even if you’re thinking that you like all movies with trolls in it, here’s the best part… There’s not a single troll in the entire movie.